Reflections of Light Thru Blaque

Random Saturday A.M. Thoughts...

(Sunday edit of Saturday's post) - Here's a picture of the group I hung out with at the festival and here goes a picture of the new hairstyle I was talking about. (End Sunday Edit)

Yikes.. sitting here shortly before 8 am Saturday morning with a bit of a headache. My hair is braided a little too tight for comfort. Or could it be that i'm sensitive in that area. I'm not used to having my hair styled and whatnot.. I got a lil bored with the short afro, and went to the weeve lady. She put my hair in lil cornrows and croched some loose curly hair on my head..

I'm in love with it. Light brown curly fluffy hair.. It's ultra sexy and wild looking. Quite a few guys were peeping me yesterday (to my suprise). You'd think I was the invisible woman before this weeve. I dunno what it is with men and big hair, or long hair.

I wanted to kick my momma for commenting "wow you look alot better and younger" after seeing the new hair.. I dont think she's digging my usual short afro too much, but hell it took her forever to get used to the locks when I had those. She's just not a natural hair fan (on me).. Naw let me rephrase that she does not dig short hair (on me).

Last night I had alot I wanted to say, but it all went away in my sleep, cuz I'm sitting here now scratching my head like "Ummmmmmmmm what now"

I'm hanging out today with a "multicultural" group. Probably a mix of Indian, white and hispanic, and the French folks.. Should provide for interesting blogging when I get back home.. I'm dragging my momma to this event, cuz lawd knows I'm not tryinna be the only "black" in the crowd today.. Besides mommy's comments are always good for personal comic relief. Me and her think too much alike sometimes, and we communicate volumes with just a look at each other. It's all in the eyes.

Got my grades in the mail. A sista is oficially off probation, and I'm the owner of a pretty little 3.2 GPA. (thanks to getting 2 A's last semester) However, summer school is now in session, and it looks like it's gearing up to kick my ass royally. My group projects should work out good this term. First day of class I hadn't been in the room 5 seconds, when me and my partner set eyes on each other, and we were blah blah blah blah blah all over each other.

Times like that it painfully brings to mind how I get along fabulously with most females I encounter. I can go on and on and on with convo. Men on the other hand make me clam up like woah and ya can't get me to say 2 words..

I'm so painfully shy with menz... sighs.. and the times i'm not shy i'm acting mean as hell and antisocial.. Yeah i'm a bitch.. sue me.

A chunk of money fell into my lap yesterday. A relative brought me nice sized check. However I can't go tricking off at the mall with it. It's gotta go into savings, to get us through the summer months when my mom will be working less hours. Gotta keep the lights, gas, cable, and phone on. *Thank you Lord* But ya know i'm goinna scratch off a little bit of that money on the side for my own personal maintenance.

My momma's boss saw me the other day (first time in like 5 months) and said "Heyyyya Skinnie Minnie" I was so happy to hear that my heart almost jumped in my throat.. I'm FAR from skinny but I dropped quite a bit of weight last year, and its's starting to come off again.. Ya know she had to ask my momma on the low if I was sick. I'm like damn why does a person have to be sick to loose weight.. Some peoples change their eating habits and exercise. It is possible ya know.

Funny how the tables turn.. My homie who I have not seen in 2 yrz or so came by last night. Back in the day she wore like a size 10 in the waist with huge titties. Men used to go crazy bout her body. (Meanwhile at the time I was wearing about a 22 in the jeans and a XXL shirt..) Fast forward to today and her kid is like 3 yrz old now and she has not lost that pregnancy weight. Combined with her horrible eating habits.. Now she's wearing about a 20 in the jeans, and i'm in a 14 (20 pounds lighter) She was blown back when she saw me.. and it felt damn good.. But I feel bad for her incredible gain in the stomach and azz.

My momma's homie brought us over a damn near new looking tv and microwave for the kitchen. That old microwave had been with us since about 1988. Sucka was so huge and old-school that it wuz big enuff for a german shepard to crawl up in and cook himself. Aight not a pretty sight, but it was that damn big. So now we got a cute little one and a tv too, all for the low low low price of 20 bucks.. We got the hookup fah real.. and naw dude aint a crackhead he gets stuff from companies that go outta business, and keeps em @ his warehouse for sales.. He said he's got a pile of leather coats for 5 bucks each.. Ohhhhh yes i'm on it next week. Believe that.

and that brings to a conclusion.. my random thoughts for an early Saturday morning.. I'm outtie.. Be blessed and safe this memorial day weekend.. Holla

Musically Speaking...

Ok.. I'm feeling her single with Kanye.. I'm also digging the video. Hopefully the rest of the cd is equally bouncy and diggable.. but please tell me whatz up with her new image.. Is it me or is sista girl looking like a cracked out Be.yon.ce.. That haircolor is not doing a damn thang for her.. but ummmm who's heard the cd I wanna know if its any better than her last one. Cuz lawd knows that full-moon was some hot garbage.

I picked up his cd recently from my favorite lil record shop Dr.Wax.. It's only released in england right now, so I jumped up and down like a fool when I saw it the other day. Yes I paid 18 bucks for it, cuz its not scheduled for full release in the usa for another month or two.. Be out on the lookout for my boy R. He always comes correct with the music. This is his 3rd cd and he just seems to keep getting better and better.. My only complaint is its too short, and he does not have any power-ballads on there to show off his voice.. This joint is mostly dance type tracks or should I say up-tempo joints.. But its damn good music.

Don't miss dat party train..

A sista got her party on for an amazing 5 hours Friday nite.. Around hour 3 it was exhausting.. At hour 4 my feet were swollen.. and at hour five I was barely awake.. Is a 5 hour concert too much of a good thing?? Damn-it yes it is. I took my mom to the soul106 explosion Friday nite.. I know how much she loves Morris-Day so of course I had to get us tix for her birthday.. We had a jamming good time in the 6th row (dreamy seats)..

Rose Royce opened up the show with some of their best hits (i wanna get next to you, car wash, i'm going down) Then came the SOS-Band.. I LOVEEEEEE me some SOS so the whole set was off the chain.. Morris-Day came out with The-Time and ripped it up.. Dude was looking so damn good it was like he's been sipping from the fountain of youth.. Dude looks as good as he did in 1984 when he was doing it up in Purple-Rain.. He was mighty damn sexy and I wanted to get him back-stage and slowly pull him outta that pimp suit he had on.. Of course his homie Jerome was there clowining and holding the mirror for pretty-morris to look at himself in the mirror..

The set closed with The-Gap-Band (why wuz they on stage 2 hrz).. Now I love the gap but damnnn a sista was getting sleepy cuz it was pushing up on the midnite hour... I woke up when R-Kelly and Tyrese came out on stage with em to sing Kelly's joint Happy-People.. Now I don't like Kelly like that but I did get geeked to see him live on stage for the first time.. and when Tyrese came out and started singing I just about lost my mind looking at his sexy black ass.

Show was over @ midnite and me and mommy left exhausted, and got ourselves some breakfast @ the 24 hour spot downtown.. I can't complain about feeling old and tired these days, cuz that old lady I lovingly call mommy hung in there with me and kicked it and loved the show.. Wish I could do stuff like that with her more often.. Summer-04 is goinna be off tha chain.

*Exits singing with Morris-Day - Fishnet black pantyhose.. big legs show thru the holes*

Why don't cha talk to Tone... Click

If there's one place you don't want to be it's on my bad side. Well there's a few worse places I can think of off the top of my head (hell, fighting in iraq, north pole, fat-camp) But being on my bad side is ranking up there with those places that just are not a positive thing to experience. Unfortunately for an associate of mine (friend of a friend) she's doing the watusi on my last black nerve. The heffa would have better experience tap dancing blind-folded in a mine-field. *I'm so sincere*

So ole girl calls me late last night and asks me how i'm doing. I'm like ummmm kool.. She proceeds to ask me for a favor (my bullshit detector immediately started to twitch) She asks me to use the 3-way on my celly to click over and call her ex-boyfriends crib, and ask for him to see if he's there or not. Me being the curious individual I am, I wanna know why she can't call there herself and find out if he is at home.. Long story short - his family can't stand her and they hang up on her every time they see her number on the caller ID.. She figures that if they see a diffrent number they will pick up the phone, and of course i've got to ask for him because they know her voice and will surely hang up the second the says Hello. They can't stand her silly ass so much, that the first syllable woulda got out like "HEL" and there wouldn't have been any "LO".. just a *CLICK* and dialtone in her ear.

At this point i'm major annoyed that this 32 year old woman is on some 15 year old high-school-maturity-level, and had the nerve to call me asking me to participate in phone games.. I rolled my eyes so hard they damn near got stuck.. I remembered doing silly lil stuff like that my sophomore year in high school with my lil homies.. Yes indeed 3-way calling got many a negro in trouble back in the day..

I'll admit that my asshole-tendancies got the best of me and I wanted to do it just to hear someone cuss her out when they found out it was her on the phone. However I really didn't want strangers having my celly number in their caller id and calling me back on some cuss-out-shit.. This chick begins to plead, beg, and damn near cry for me to participate in this silly scheme.. She was bold about her shit, damn near giving orders like.. (all you have to do is, it's so easy, i need you to do this, this is important to me, just call him, ask for him, do it for me now) Meanwhile i'm calmly explaining to the chick that the whole thing makes me feel hella uncomfortable and I don't want to call his house...

Picture this.. i'm sitting in my bed with a strange with a mixture of irratation and amusement, as I pretend to not know how to work my 3-way function properly.. Ole girl took it to the next level and proceeded to call Sprint's customer service from her celly and get the service agent on the phone, to walk me through it... By now i'm putting the phone down and laughing at her ass for actually taking it that far.. She got all snippy with customer service and whatnot..

In the end I told her I can't do it, and I've gotta get back to balancing my checkbook. (Yes I told her that I was busy with my checks when she called, and she was not considerate about it either) She got hella mad when things didn't work out. I could hear it in her voice, it changed and got real nasty.. She hastily said goodbye and hung up.. I rolled across my bed laughing at that joint for about 5 minutes..

I feel bad for the girl.. Their relationship is like a restraining-order waiting to happen.. She's got stalker tendancies and it's actually scary to sit back and listen to some of the plots she comes up with to get this guy back, and to get him to marry her.. I really don't wanna be a part of the drama so I may have to hold back on being friends with this girl.. She's hella kool, but damn, who wants to deal with that nonsense all the time.. and like I said earlier, she don't know it yet, but last night she found my nerve and plucked it like a professional.. She's hella lucky she caught me in the right mood and frame of mind.. It coulda got real ugly and dirty..

I know you saw me.. cuz I saw you.

I hopped on the train happy and carefree. My whole body and head was soaking wet from the heavy rains, my stomach was full of pancakes and chicken sausage from the breakfast joint. All was good in my world today. Sat my ass right on down in my seat, the train took off, and i looked over to the left. Lawd have mercy, there he was. My ex from 2002. A man who broke my heart into millions of peices and pissed on the shredded pile he made of my arteries and veins. Can ya believe he had the nerve to turn his head and stare aimlessly out the window like he didn't see me sittin there. I only caught him out of the corner of my eye so I acted like I didn't see him sitting right across from me either.. Calmly I got up and walked real slow to the other end of the train. From the other seat I stared a hole in his back. Looking at the dark skin of his neck and upper back. Remembering how my tounge fit so seemingly perfect on that neck.. I remembered, I smirked, and rolled my eyes.. He probably watched my reflection in the window. I wonder if he watched me as I watched him silently.. (yeah there's more)

I considered taking the cowards way out and getting off the train a few stops early, to avoid an uncomfortable scene when we both got off. Surely we'd bump into each other at the escalator/stairs.. Then I was like awwww hell naw I did nothing wrong, and have no guilt, why should I run from his ass. In fact I considered getting up and going to sit in the empty seat next to him. I wouldn't even speak or look at him. Just sit there and feel satisfaction as he squirmed being that close to me and my energy again.. I'd even pretend to fall asleep and let my head fall to the side, brushing his shoulder.. (Yes i'm petty and my revenge tactics are twisted. Thought ya knew)

In the end he got off the train the stop before he was supposed to. I had to bite my lip to hold back a giggle. From the corner of my eye I watched him watch me again as he exited the train, and get a glance as the train pulled off. We never made eye to eye contact or acknowledged each other's prescence, but the non-verbals were strong and uncomfortable..

So amazing that all my ex's are no longer my friends, and i'm not even on friendly speaking terms with people who once knew me so well. It's a weird feeling to know that folks that you've fucked and cared about at one point, could care less if you took your next breath, after it's all over.

After the love is gone.....

Ohhh so random

I've got a final exam tonight.. i'm goinna wing it.. Dude can't possibly expect us to memorize 15 chapters of the book.. surely he was kidding.. right.. See this is what happens when a professor does not give a midterm, but saves all the material from day one of class until the end of class, and presents one huge final exam.

Final tomorrow night.. I'm totally not going to wing it.. I've been writing and typing notes for 3 days and slowly letting the information marinate and seep into my brain cells.. My study methods are turning radically unconventional.

I can comprehend about 3/4th of the material for tomorrow night.. Gotta work on that last 1/4th tomorrow morning and afternoon.

Only me would strongly pratice the method of study for an hour, break half an hour, study half an hour then break for an hour, on and on for several hours..

I got my first pedicure of the season yesterday... My feet are soft as baby cat wiskers, toenails painted hot pink, and I looked damn sexy in my high-heel sandals too.

I was limping home in those sexy sandals... Damnit i'm goinna conquer this hi-heel phobia at some point.

Picked up some honey hair conditioner from the body shop yesterday.. It cost a pretty penny, but damn my afro has never been softer or fluffier.

Watching Tha.Sw.an is a guilty pleasure.. I know its wrong, but damn that joint is funny sometimes.

Just watched the last hour of Tha.H.ulk on cable.. damn that was a major snoozefest. Glad I didn't spend my loot on that joint at the movies.

I've got a job interview Thursday, but i'm not dropping details until I know if i'm gettin the gig or not.. I've got a very positve feeling about this one.. They seem to love me on paper, and by phone.. so i'm thinking the interview will be the official meet and greet before hire. (it's not for more pay, but the experience and benefits are un-beatable)

(Wishful thinking) Can't wait to see the look on my current boss' face when I tell him i'm bouncing out to another spot.. D.Cha.pelle voice "Kiss my ass bitches"

My last day of counceling is tomorrow. It's been 8 intense weeks with the therapist but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I've really learned about about myself, conquered some fears, faced demons inside me, and made progress.. Thank goodness for free programs @ school.. Take advantage of those joints while the opportunity is there.

Looks at calendar.. I've been panic attack free for 30 days *cheers*

I dunno if its the warmer weather or what, but i'm hornier than a toad lately. (reminds self to stock up on AA batteries)

I'm loving my afro but weeve can be a girl's best friend. I'm not scared of fake hair. A wet look set of interlocked curly hair may be on the agenda if my money acts a little better next month.

Tiz all for now... holla

Tiz all about me me me me meme

Well.. I got this meme from Shun, who got it from Crackmonkie who got it from Sunray... get my drift

(x) I Have Been Drunk
(x) I Have Smoked Pot
( ) I Have Done Cocaine
( ) I Have Done Other Drugs
(x) I Have Thrown Up In A Bar
( ) I Have Flashed Someone
( ) I Have Posed Nude
(x) I Have Purchased Pornography
( ) I Have Been Caught Masturbating
(x ) I Have Pissed On Myself
(x) I Have Kissed A Member Of The Opposite Sex
( ) I Have Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex
(x) I Have Made Out With A Stranger
(x ) I Have Gone On A Blind Date
(x) I Have Been In Love
(x) I Have Been Dumped
(x) I Have Had Sex
( ) I Have Had Anal Sex
( ) I Have Had Sex In Public
( ) I Have Had Sex With A Member Of The Same Sex
( ) I Have Had Sex With A Co-Worker
( ) I Have Had Sex At The Office
( ) I Have Had Sex In A Dressing Room
() I Have Had Sex At A Friend's House During A Party
() I Have Had Sex / Hooked Up With A Friend's Sibling
(x) I Have Gotten Someone Drunk To Have Sex With Them
( ) I Have Had Sex With More Than 1 Person In The Same Week
( ) I Have Had A Threesome (it's on my to do list)
(x) I Have Received Scars From My Sex Partner
( ) I Have Been Married
( ) I Have Been Divorced
(x) I Have Snuck Out Of My Parent's House
( ) I Have Cut Myself On Purpose
( ) I Have Killed Someone
( ) I Have Purposely Set A Part Of Myself On Fire
( ) I Have Crashed A Friend's/Mom's Car
(x ) I Have Shoplifted
(x) I Have Stolen Something From My Job
( ) I Have Been Fired (damn near.. lol)
( ) I Have Been In A Fist Fight
(x) I Have Been Tied Up
( ) I Have Been Arrested
(x) I Have Ridden In A Taxi
(x) I Have Lied To A Friend
(x) I Have Skipped School
(x ) I Have Had A Crush On A Teacher
( ) I Have Celebrated Mardi-Gras In New Orleans
( ) I Have Celebrated New Years In Time Square
( ) I Have Been To Japan (heck naw but i've been to Ghana,Africa)
( ) I Have Been To Europe
( ) I Have Been Snowboarding
(x ) I Have Eaten Sushi

Just when I thought i'd seen it all...

"The Blacks" have to go and prove me wrong. Obviously I have not seen it all because this shit right here blew my mind (and not in a positive way)

So i'm chyllin @ the movies wit my homie, her sexy cousin (who i'm crushing on) and preparing to watch Van.H.els.ing (damn good movie) and we've gotta sit thru the terrible summer movie trailers.. I was still gagging and cursing about the previews of Soul-P.lane when I saw Shawn and Marlon (the coon-tastic duo) in this flick right here... (Wh.ite-Chi.cks)

Ok... so now i've seen it all... Nothing else can shock me about "the blacks"
(or so I say now) anywayz i'm on my way to bed.. i'll drop a lil post about van-he.lsing tomorrah

Babygirl got the bubbleguts

Happy to report 2 projects are complete and outta my hair.. If I must be vain and pat myself on the back i've just gotta say that I kicked ass on em. The 40 minute group project went smoothly and I was on top of my game.. The 10 minute presentation was much more laid back and casual, so I breezed through it like a champ.. Just gotta settle down and study my azz off for finals next week.. I'm smelling 2 A's this semester.

Smelling A's is much better than smelling my own funk. Lawd knows i've endured quite enough of it tonight. A sista is lactose intolerant like *woah*yet I keep ordering and consuming Vanilla Steamers from the coffee shop.. Since i've been forced by my doctor to give up caffine for health reasons, i'm turning to other beverages that are warm and will keep my tounge delightfully happy.. So the steamed milk with a shot of vanilla syrup has been my drink of choice lately.. Unfortunately drinking milk leaves me firing cannons outta my ass for the next few hours after consumption. So there I was with my partner in front of the class, trying to make my way through my presentation, with my ass cheeks clenched together so tightly I coulda shit a diamond if I had eaten a lump of coal for lunch. I'm ohhhhhhhhhh so thankful that I didn't have to come home and blog about letting out a king-sized-fart in the middle of my speech. I never woulda been able to show my face in that school again.. *I'm so sincere*

And wouldn't ya knw it, tonight I had on my brand new sexy-panties. Got me some white and red hipsters (string at the hips) that say *Supergirl* across the behind, and have the red *superman* logo near the upper crotch.. I think they are mighty damn cute, and if I had more male visitors I'd probably be bold and link a photo of my ass with *supergirl* across the butt.. Thankfully i've got more chicks visiting this spot than anything *laughs* I'm loosing track of my story now.. Ohhhhhh yeah.. All that to say that I damn near ended up *Super-Shitty* instead of *super-girl* Cuz my stomach was rumbling and cramping like a volcano.

Tomorrow i'm opting for the soy-milk-steamer. I love silk-soy milk in my breakfast cereal, but for some reason imagine it to taste weird when steamed.. Guess i'll find out tomorrow.