I don't want to be the drunk blogger.. My sunday night posts are heavy with wine and vodka. Since i'm at home tonight I may as well spit a lil sumthin on here. I'm looking at the clock and knowing that I was supposed to go an event tonight, but lack the energy or desire to deal with people right about now. I pretty much sat in my room sulking all day, bounced out to go grocery shopping, returned home to cook up a feast, and now i'm bored silly. I'm trying to do better with my eating habits.. I'll admit to being out of control these days. I am trying HARD to kick the sugar habit but its kicking me instead. Way too much ice cream, smoothies, and I won't even get started on the treats at crack.bucks in the building where I work. I've been pretty much maintaining my weight and neither gaining nor loosing anything significant, but lately I can feel my skinny-jeans fitting tighter and i'm sooooo not trying to go up a size..
I ended up spending far far far too much money at the grocery store.. Fresh fruits, veggies, lean meat, and organic items sure ain't cheap.. Is it any wonder why americans (particularlly sistas) are so damn fat (let's dis-own the word thick for now) When you've got a family on a budget, with a bunch of kids, what do you think the grocery cart is going to look like.. Will she buy the 3.00 a loaf whole grain - 12 grain wheat bread with flax and omega 3 OR the 75 cent white bread on sale.. Chances are the white bread goes in the cart.. Will the baby corn, beansprouts, asparagus, eggplant, and spinach salad go in the cart OR will the kids get chips, canned/frozen veggies, fishsticks, and kool-aid.. Hell i'm the first to admit that over the last year or so, the grocery bill has gone from 75 every other week, up to about 150 every other week.. I can't totally blame it on the increasing costs of food, I'm making diffrent choices.. Although I can't see the results in my waistline, my skin is clear, glowing and smooth. My hair and nails are growing like wild weeds too... (only if my lazy ass would start going to the gym i'd really be on the road to wellness)
I really hadn't noticed my skin looks great, but sistas I don't even know have been walking up on me to compliment me on my complexion and smoothness (i've been makeup free all those times) If I look this good with the bare minimum of health hookups that i've been doing, imagine how banging i'd be if I was serious about the damn thang.. I was on Holiday's blog and she mentioned drinking a gallon of water a day.. Sheeshhhhhh it's a challenge and serious struggle to get me to drink 20 - 32 ounces a day.. I'll be honest and admit that sometimes I'll skip a few days and not drink any at all.. A gallon seems like mission impossible.. But i've learned alot from her, changed my attitude about alot, this is an acheiveable goal if I reach for it.. I've managed to suck down 16 ounces while sitting at the desk typing this.. I can refill the bottle and be up to 32 before bedtime.. Seems silly to be starring this habit now (at this time of night) i'll surely be up and down all night running to the bathroom to pee.
Anyhoo i've got more cooking to do tomorrow, as if I didn't do enuff tonight.. I did a HUGE pot of turkey chilli with black and red beans. Could have went the quick route and used canned beans but nooooooooo I took the extra step and cooked the dry beans first, then added the chilli fixings.. So much more healthy to use the real bean instead of the canned stuff full of sodium and additives. Since it was my first time cooking with real beans I didn't know how much to fix and used a whole bag of both red and black.. Ended up with wayyy too many beans and had to seperate half of the batch to a 2nd pot.. Rather than freeze it and end up with a mushy reheat next month I decided to do a pot of beans n rice for my neighbor. I'll take it to him tomorrow with some freshly made cornbread. We always look out for him and help him out with food because he's not working and a troubled nam.vet. Working odd jobs and whatnot is not putting alot of food on his table. But my delicious turkey chilli is not for tomorrah, it's for a bit later in the week. Tomorrah's focus is pan seared mahi with pineapple salsa, baked potato and spinach stirfry. I can't wait to get started on that one.
Anyhoo i'm outta here I've got more water to suck down and I doubt i'll get much sleep if i'm on pee-run all nite. . Mental note to start it EARLY tomorrow and not wait until the night hours..
I'm cracking up right now because in my last post's comments Holiday-N came thru and asked if I was still drunk, due to not posting in a week.. Well i'm sober now, but I was drunk again last night. Sundays are turning into "Super-Tini-Sunday" and i'm getting my sipp on regularly.. After cooking a damn good dinner of baked chicken, pasta and broccoli, and mexican cornbread I sat down to dine with my roomie.. Of course we drank a bottle of a delicious New.Zealand Rose' wine with the meal. He was already kinda tipsy when he arrived to the house for dinner, the wine added to his state of lush, then he decided its martini time.. After knocking back a white.russian.martini I was really lushed out... It feels good to start the week with a lil buzz, but damn can't be doing that on the regular. Besides i'm outta vodka and probably won't be buying anymore for quite some time. (ummm quite some time means a few weeks knowing us fools)
I think I pissed off one of my girlfriends tonite.. We started talking about her credit and how bad it is. She was like I need to take care of this because you can't really do alot of things when your credit is all jacked up.. Then in then in the next breath she asked me to go to canada with her and said she's planning on going to Jamacia. My response "girl fuck a trip - i'm trying to get my money rite and invest" Next thing I know the convo has gone dead and she's getting off the phone.. Me and my mouth stays in trouble I swear.. I didn't even go into the lecture-mode that I could have.. laughs.. I'll keep my damn mouth shut from now on.. But seriously, what the hellz do I look like flying off to the tropics and i'm trying to get my investments on, and pay off some debts.. I qualify to get into the company 401.k next month, i've taken an investment class, and right now i'm reading "investing.for.dum.mies" Got a few thousand saved up and looking for the right avenue to take with it... Sure I could blow it on a flight, hotel, and food.. but if invested right i'll have my funds in order and be able to fly on out on the interest and not the bundle.. But we must live and learn.
In an effort to live a bit more fabulous, have fun, and be social I joined my best-friend's restaurant club. It started off small with her and her sister, their female cousins and whatnot.. Eventually the circle grew with their girlfriends comming, and now those chicks are bringing friends.. It's grown from 3 -4 girls up to about 15.. Once a month they go to a diffrent hott spot in the city for cocktails and dinner. I went on Saturday and had such a good time. Nothing like being out with a large group of professional, beautiful, classy sistas who know they are fabulous and cultured. While it was easy for me to see the sophistication and style in my sisters at the table, I wonder what other people saw when they looked at our group.. A bunch of loud, shitty-tipping, gum popping, wrong-fork-using, cussing and cackling black womenz?? I think not.
I really didn't appreciate the waiter trying to talk slang to us.. You could look at him and tell those words had no part in his regular vocabulary, nor did he use it with any of his white customers, but he gets his ass to our table and says "ohhh I was just frontin" in response to a question someone asked him. I coulda threw a fork at him for that one.. Dude was whitty and perky with everybody else in his area, gets to us and goes ghetto.. and just for that I kept my english extra crisp and proper.. Now i'm sure he didn't mean any harm by it, but just the knowledge that people feel the need to change their routine up just because "the blacks" come in is just plain sad. I'm not the type to worry about what other people think about me, but I can't help to be observant and ponder the situation.. But we do most of this shit to ourselves. The stereotypes are put out there like a song and we dance to its beat like puppets.. Dong the la.ffy.ta.ffy all the way to the bank.. But that's a rant for another night.
Anyhoo i'm going my azz to bed early.. I really need to re-do my manicure because it's hella chipped, but i'm lazy.. screw it.. I can work with it for one more day.
I'm suprised that I didnt wake up with a hangover this morning.. I was hella bored last night. After a long day of cooking, going to church for easter, then sitting on the couch and doing nothing. I came up with the idea to drink for amusement. My roomie was on the phone trying to convince some of his peeps to go to the club with him, they declined, so he sat on the couch pouting and feeling too lazy to take the train there..
My brilliant idea was to break in my new set of martini glasses and the pretty new shaker from crate.n.bar.rell. At first I was a bit pissed that there was only enuff chamb.or.d to make one french.mar.tin.i but I made it for him, and went back to make myself a white.rus.sian martini.. Khalua,vodka,milk,shaken hard with a dribble of maple syrup and topped with whipped cream... Knowing how spoiled that man can be, he poked out his lip, eyed my drink, and we ended up trading..
I guzzled the french, he guzzled the russian, and next thing I know we are back in the kitchen making more drinks.. After a few I was feeling giggly and stupid, laid across the couch, put my head on his lap, he threw an arm around my shoulder and we acted a damn fool watchin tv n talkin drunken shit. Of course the conversation turned to sex *no not with each other* and the liqua kept flowing.. By the time I started doing shots it was officially a wrap. I dragged my ass to bed round 1 am, drank a big bottle of water to fight off the next morning dehydration/hangover then slept long and hard..
The easter weekend was fabulous..... Didn't even eat too many chocolate treats.. hope everyone's weekend was great and the easter bunnie came by your place with treats, plastic eggs, and candies..
Lately i've been reading various books on the train back and forth to work.. Usually I try to drown out the bullshit and noise that goes on with public transportation by putting on some music or pluggin up the earpeice to the celly and yacking my way to work.. I can see the diffrence between the two actions now.. With a good book I can loose myself in words and thoughts and try to block out the nonsence around me but can get jarred out of my little world a little too easily.. With the headphones I can turn out everybody, and people are much less inclined to mess with you if they see your ears are clogged up with earbuds.. Which is not always the case because once a guy shook me by the shoulder to get my attention asking me for spare change when I couldn't hear his ass over the music.. Yeah I gave him the look of death and he moved on.
However tonight the scene was so hillarious and bad on the train that not even music on blast could drag me away from looking at it.. A guy was sitting across from me with a laptop on his lap and he was keying away at something.. That's not a typical site, but that's not what made it odd.. He had some sort of wireless device hooked up to it and was yacking away on his cell phone too.. He had a 2nd cell phone resting on the laptop.. Whatever he was saying had to be krazy because the people around him looked amused.. I had him totally tuned out when I saw him reach into his backpack and pullout a bottle of crown royal.. This fool starts to guzzle the crown straight-no-chaser right from the bottle (much to the delight of train passengers) Dude sits there yapping away, messing with the laptop, and drinking the crown like water.. I knew that amusement was on the way and hoped for a drunken spectacle.
There is a trick to watching a spectacle unfold without looking directly at it... Giving direct eyecontact is like inviting yourself to participate in whatever bullshit takes place.. it helped that I had dark shades on, and glanced over in a non-direct fashion... The chick in front of me however was not so lucky... Drunk-ass starts flirting away with her, slurring and whatnot, it must have been a hoot because people around him are watching and giggling.. I just turned the music up louder instead.. After she gets off the train this fool really let loose.. He started to dump out his backpack and set the contents of the bag on the floor next to him, right in the middle of the train isle. Out come 2 bottles of Heinecken and he offers one to the dreadlocked brutha nearby.. Dread declines the brew, and offends the drunken fool.. He starts gettin loud with anybody in earshot... WHAT.. NOBODY WANTS TO DRINK WITH ME.. DOES ANYBODY WANT A GOTT DAMN HEINECKEN.. YALL FUCKERS THINK YALL 2 GOOD.. U KNOW U WANT THIS BEER.. COME AND GET ONE.. GOTT DAMN IT..
By this time the people at the other end of the train are watching and laughing their asses off.. This fool sits the beers down, sits down the crown royal and then picks the crown back up, spins it like a bar trick, catches it, and takes a swig... I'm pratically biting my lip bloody tryin not to laugh, and watchin this fool carefully in case i gotta run away if bottles start flyin.. Next thang I know he's tryin to get off the train.. tripps over the beer and the bottles roll across tha floor.. He shoves the laptop into the bag, walks past the beer, lets his cell phone headset fall to the floor, and walks his drunk ass off the train..
Now i've seen alot.. but that shit right there took the cake (took the pie and the pudding too)
Speaking of pie... (now i'm thinking about cooking) Did I mention getting a new oven a few posts back.. Yeah the old oven broke cuz it was older than me, and we put it out of its misery... The new one came Saturday night.. The delivery guys promised to be there at 4.30, which got pushed back to 5.30 then to 6.30.. By 8.00 I was pissed off, had given up, and had plans on cussin somebody at the store out in the morning.. I was so bored and irritated that i was in the bed by 9.30 pm.. At about 9.50 the doorbell rings, and its the late delivery guys.. They looked quite foolish, begged me not to cuss them out, and asked if they could still deliver or reschedule for tomorrow.. I took one look at him and said.. heck yes you're delivering tonight I dont trust you to come back tomorrow, i'll be waiting for hours again.
By 10.30 the install was complete. I was rather sleepy.. and the poor delivery guys said they had 2 more big jobs to do that night trying to catch up on their work.. I felt really bad for them.. Shit if you think its hard.out.there.for.a.pimp.. It's really fucking hard out there for a appliance delivery guy... These poor guys didn't even have a mechanical device to wheel the old stove out, or the new one in.. They hitched it to straps, hooked it over their shoulders and backs, and walked the hell on out with it in ropes.. I was lookin like what kind of ole stone age shit is this.. As modern as we are in this world, and bruthas are breaking their backs tying stoves to their torso's and walkin them out to the alley, then bringing the new one in the same way... Like I said.. It's fucking hard out there for a appliance delivery guy.. I woulda tipped em, but I was annoyed they were delivering at 10 pm.. Well I won't be hard on em for the service survey that will be comming soon.. I do have a heart ya know.
Apparently liqua makes the night go by smoother and I forgot that shit.. But on the other hand its advantageous to be stone cold sober at a party because some of the stuff you see when you are soberly people watching you'd definately miss when drunk. I was at home Saturday nite eating dinner and watching some tv, getting settled in for a boring night when my Roomie came home all excited. He announced that his sisters boyfriend was having a party and that we should attend. I was a bit annoyed that he didn't call me from the road to alert me because I was sitting there looking like a creature in my bathrobe, hair a mess, nails unpainted, and no idea of what i'd wear. Didn't this man realize that I had to do a transformation in order to be party presentable. First thing I did was ask him if it was a club-bangin party or a classy affair with wine and cheese. I hoped it was a stuck-up wine n cheese affair because I lacked the energy to kick it official at the club. He claimed it was classy and very dressy and he ran off to his room to pick out a suit. I sighed and went to the closet to find something sexxy/classy to put on at a moments notice. On went the daddy-come-screw-me-boots, black pants, black camisole, and black wrap sweater after a quick shower and rush makeup job. He was lookin quite flyy in a black suit with pale purple dress shirt, tie, and stylish fedora..
Next thang I know we are on the train, rushing off to this party in Chinatown.. Trying to get there before the guestlist closed he grabs me by the arm and pratically drags me down the street. I'm tryin to keep up with his long legged stride and struggling along in my high heeled boots (cursing up a storm as I was dragged a block) Greeted by his sisters boyfriend outside the club we head upstairs, check in with the hostess, and enter the reddest damn room i've ever been in. Now I know it was in chinatown but did everything in site have to be in red decor (walls, couches, chairs, bar, floor, lights, art, ect) I was a lil nervous to look around and not see any wine and cheese in site. Ummm what happened to the classy upscale affair I was promised. This looked like another nite at the club. Folks were gettin hella drunk, music was bumpin, nice multicultural crowd (what else would ya expect in chinatown) and again I say no wine or cheese in site.
I luv my roomie's sister, greeted her warmly, and sat my ass next to her on the red couch.. I complimented her outfit and looked down at my own.. Just a bit irratated that I was dressed for a classy event, and should have shown up in club-gear.. I needed some slut appeal in my outfit, at least some major cleavage showing or something. Deciding to sit my ass on the big comfy leather couch seemed like a good idea so I stuck with it like glue. I'm not a dancer, and there are probably surburban white.gyrls in a little hick town somewhere in Kansas that could dance circles around my rhythm-less-nation ass. In fact the only times i've danced in public I was drunk out of my mind. Since I was sober as hell the chances of me getting up were slim to none. For some reason this pissed off my roomie and he kept trying to get me up. No way in the hell i'd ever dance with him. It would look like a scene from that terrible movie wit julia.styles. save.the.las.t.dance. The hip hop dancing pro showing the clueless girl how to move her ass with some blackness.. Hell 2 the naw.. not in public.. Besides he makes me nervous because he gets out there like a mix between U.sh.er. and Chris.Bro.wn dancing for the grammy nite awards n shit.. On more than one occasion I saw him drop at the knees, let his body drop, backbone hit the floor, and pop back up to his feet, and spin.. Like a damn music video or sum shit... Yeah I really want to get out there with u homie.. laughs.. I knew it was over for him when he took off his nice suit jacket, tie, and shirt and tossed it to the couch.. Out there dancin in his black wifebeater and drippin sweat like niagra falls.
He found a sexxy lil dance partner and stayed with her all nite long. She kept up with his moves, moved her body like a professional. I sat back n watched them dance all nite. The body chemistry was amazing, it was very sexual, and it was like they had known each other for years. Overall I was feelin quite self-concious and it made me feel a bit sick to my stomach to imagine any of the men at that party dancin with me or touching me like that.. Hummmm more proof of my social anxieties and lack of trust. Unbelievable that the thought of a stranger invading my personal space that strongly had me feeling ill and very much at ease. In fact I couldn't pull myself together enough to talk to anybody that night. A few guys came over to talk, tried to buy me drinks and chit chat, and my Icy response sent em running for the hills in search of easier prey. My roomie peeped this shit, saw my responses, and was acting upset. Later I explained to him my issues are pretty deep seeded and he understood.
The highlight of the night was sitting there in all my sober glory drinking on water and peeping a damn near fight on the dance floor. Apparently my roomie's older sister's boyfriend had himself in a pickle because his ex-gyrlfriend showed up to the party too. She flirted, hugged him a bit too long, and chatted it up with him alot that nite, much to the unhappiness of his girlfriend. While dude was dancing with his girlfriend the ex walked over, words were exchanged, and next thang I know the ex shoves the girlfriend in the back... My eyes got big, and I knew i saw that shit clearly because I hadn't had any drinks. First thing I did was look for my roomie because I know his temper is hott and fucking with his big sister like that would set him off instantly. After peeping that he missed it because he was too busy getting his flirt on with the chick he had danced wit all nite, my eyes went back to the situation. I was really proud of his big sister for holding herself together really lady-like and not smackin the shit outta that chick. I could tell by her eyes that she was ready to explode, her man grabbed her and held her, hugged her, and started talking in her ear.. After a few minutes of him talking her down from fight-mode, she cooled down enough to be let go of physically. She knew better than to tell her brother what happened because he'd be all over that chick like white on rice.
After the party I told him what happened after we were about 2 blocks away and safely up on the train platform (around 3 am). He was furious and demanded to know why I didn't tell him.. Then he was glad I didn't tell him because he admitted that if I had mentioned it on the spot, or even outside the club, he would have went back and...... well let's just say that I'd have ended up at the jail that night trying to bail him out after he finished acting da fool.. Thank you Lord for keepin all of us safe, out of fights, keepin the right people blind from drama, keepin me sober so i'd be in control if something popped off, and for gettin us home safe at 4 am.
The next time somebody tells me it's a classy wine n cheese affair i'll want to get proof first.. Cus i'm still wanting my damn wine n cheese.